January 5, 2013

  • Remember that nobody is perfect

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    In that little thinking session you have before you go to sleep each night,think of a way you can make the world a better place for someone else,and wake the next day with the intentions to make that thought a reality.

    Sure, there are the big moments. The “I love you’s” and the passionate kisses and the first time he grabs your hand in public, pulling you next to him and holding you close.  And those are great.  But treasure the little moments, like when you’re walking somewhere and you’re holding onto his arm, just talking; and the last kiss goodnight when he looks at you a bit sadly because he doesn’t want you to go; and the smile he gives you like there’s a secret joke between the two of you.  Treasure them, because the little moments mean so much. They are what will get your through when you miss him dearly.  The big moments are great, but it’s the little ones that will really make you fall for him.

    It hit me, today. I’m ready. I’m ready for the world. I feel bold, oh so bold, and I want to suddenly meet all those people in the world worth meeting and discover the undiscovered.

    You spend your whole life preaching about waiting for love. Well, here it is. Right in front of you, and you’re going to turn your back on it. So, I guess we’re fucked. I’ll move on, but you’re going to have to live the rest of your life knowing that you’ve turned your back on love. & that makes you a hypocrite. Have a nice life.

    I never regret anything. Because every little detail of your life is what made you into who you are in the end.

    I used to be so strong, I used to be able to do whatever I want, and then I feel like I’ve been broken down little by little. I don’t know what to do. I can’t have him talk to me like this anymore. I just want to be with someone who loves me so much. Okay, whatever, I do think I deserve to be a princess, I think that every girl deserves to be treated like a princess. But you don’t treat me like crap. That’s not okay, that’s not an excuse. Like, I know what I have to do and I know what I want to do, but why can’t get I get there? I just don’t know what to do.

    I’m not going to spend my life chasing people. You want to leave? Fine then, go ahead. Because I’m done with chasing and caring for people who never had interest in me. Nothing lasts and people change. I’ve learned love is hard and life isn’t always what you want it to be.

    You read “sorry, try again” off the inside of a bottle cap; story of your life. You never come first, you’re never the winner, you’re never the best. There’s always someone better. Maybe next time; you did your best. At least you tried. All these things are supposed to make you feel better, but it just reminds you that no matter how hard you try, how you gave it your all, you failed. You’ll never be good enough for him.

    There are some things we do because we convince ourselves it would be better for everyone involved. We tell ourselves that it’s the right thing to do, the altruistic thing to do. it’s easier than telling ourselves the truth.

    Sometimes there’s nothing to say. Sometimes silence expresses more than words. Picking up the phone, dialing a number, it can do more damage than good. But humans are afflicted with this obsessive desire to talk things to death. So we make things worse by trying to make things better.

    This is goodbye, not a simple see you later. Not because I don’t love you, but because you have your life all set out in front of you and I can’t fit in the small space you’re giving me.

    Funny when people have alcohol running in their veins, that’s when you really get to know a person.

    If you don’t like what you’re getting, change what you’re doing.

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