February 3, 2013

• Time changes everything

  

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  It sucks to know that i will always be there for him but he never sees that. He is too busy talking to these other girls who really don’t care about him like I do. He is too blind that he doesn’t see that I appreciate him and like for who he is.

  

  Recently I’ve learned that you can’t wait around for life to be good for you, you have to make it good for yourself with the resources that you have. That’s why you could own the whole entire world but if you don’t have the drive and urge to make your life special then you own absolutely nothing in the end.

  

  I believe that two people are connected at the heart. And it doesn’t matter what you do, or who you are or where you live. There are no boundaries or barriers if two people are destined to be together.

  

  I carry my own, hold my own, & i stand on my own.

  

  I take you for who you are and the person you are and the heart that you have, and I don’t let anybody interfere with that.

  

  Who you are is who you are, we’re liars, we’re thieves, we’re addicts. We take our happiness for granted until we hurt ourselves, or someone else. We hold grudges and when faced with our mistakes, we re-invent the past, we re-invent ourselves or at least we try. We’re prideful and we’re lustful and we’re incredibly flawed. And eventually our flaws catch up to us.

  

  There comes a time in everyone’s lives where they learn that the only way to live happy is to grasp, embrace, and love life, and the person that they are in it. And when they stop loving their selves and start relying on others to do it for them, well, that’s when they truly start to lose their selves and the happiness that they started to feel.

  

  The wonderful thing about falling in love is that you learn everything about that person so quickly. And if it’s true love, then you start to see yourself through their eyes and it brings out the best in you. It’s almost like you are falling in love with yourself.

  

  We just get the one life, you know. Just one. You can’t live someone else’s or think it’s more important just because it’s more dramatic. What happens matters. Maybe only to us, but it matters.

  

  Here’s to the kids that will never have 100% confidence in anything they do, and to the kids who are okay with that.

  

  As I say the words, I realize how true they are. And maybe that’s the trick to getting through it, through life: realizing that everybody, including ourselves, is lugging around some kind of screwed-up baggage. Maybe we are put here to help each other carry the loads.

  

  Please don’t ask me how my life is going- you lost the right to ask me that question when you walked away from me. I know you don’t care and the only reason you’re pretending to now is because you realized that no matter how hard you try, you’ll never find another girl stupid enough to love you like I did.

  

  We all say that we want to be skinny, beautiful, and wear the best clothes. We say we want to look like the girls in Hollywood but I think what we really want behind the words that we say is confidence.

  

  You should stop talking to him because he’s just messing with your head. But you should continue because he’s messing with it in the best way andit makes your heart thump really hard and feel as light as air and it’s themost amazing thing – until it falls back down and hits your in the chestand you can’t breathe. And it feels like you just want to die because thereis no point in living if you feel like this and it won’t get better becausehe doesn’t like you and never will, but then you talk to him and everythingis okay again because he’s amazing.

  

  Life is one big book. It’s written by the old lady down the street that you never talk to and the little boy and his family fighting cancer 500 miles away. It’s written by the ones you love, the ones you’ve heard of, and the ones you never knew existed. It’s written by you and it’s written by me. We’re all apart of life. We all write the story.

  

  If you really knew me, you’d realize I’m not the girl I was before. I’ve been hurt, walked all over, used, and rejected. I still have hope for new relationships. But if you really knew me, you’d know I’m scared to death of falling in love again. I’m scared to death of getting hurt. I’m scared to death of getting attached and thrown to the side. Please don’t do that to me. If you really knew me, you’d know I trust you.

  

  I wish my life was just a book and I could skip a few chapters to save myself from all of these feelings.

  

  Here’s to tequila shots, high heel hopes, one night stands, dirty dancing on the bar, champagne , no cover charge, cool cabbies, drunken phone calls, mangled text messages, dance floors, bright lights, bartenders, drunken pictures, mcdonalds at three a.m. messy nights, and the friends who make life worth while.

  

  Sometimes, truth isn’t good enough; sometimes people deserve more. Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded.

  

  It hurts like hell knowing that you think everybody is all the same. That scares me. You don’t trust anybody. You can’t even love anyone. Not every person you meet is gonna hurt you.. you need to realize that. You might meet people that hurt you over and over, but you need to let them go. They aren’t good for you. It kills me that you cant love again. I just want you to be happy.

  

  • 2:59 pm
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